I am feeling good today. I was able to have a great talk with my sister, get a workout in, and have a good day at work. I spent the evening with my writing friends. Overall, real good day. Mentally, feeling free and clear.
Sometimes I feel like this blog is doing nothing. That’s not true though. At the very least, it’s allowing me to record and analyze my own struggles with mental health illness. Even if no one ever reads it, it’s helping me.
I hope that it matters more than that though. We are only at the tip of the iceberg when it comes to talking about mental health. Even though I’m fairly open about it, it’s not always comfortable to talk about. And I’m a pretty open person.
Fuck though, guys, we need to talk about this more. When I go into a bad episode I’m almost a completely different person. And I have a diagnosed, and managed, chronic mental health issue. But still, I can get bad.
There is so much stigma, and misinformation out there, it’s difficult for people to be like me. To be open. To get help. And that leads to tragedy, all kinds of tragedy.
I don’t want to dismiss anything that anyone does, because the world can be terrible, but from a mental health aspect I always wonder… how much was that person suffering. What was going on in that person’s head to cause them to have so much pain? And how come no one noticed/did something/helped? Why is our society so blind toward people that are struggling? Or why is our society so closed off that people who suffer feel they’re not able to ask for help? For whatever reason?
I don’t know how to say anything else about it. I’ve written and deleted multiple things to close out this post. I guess, as long as there’s a stigma, and people are hurting themselves… or others… I need to keep writing this blog. Because that’s the only way we’re going to fix anyone. By letting them know it’s okay to talk about it. It’s okay. Please talk about it.
If you think you might harm yourself, or others, please call the Suicide Prevention Hotline, it’s free and confidential. 1-800-273-8255